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What was once readily available is suddenly gone, and no matter how hard we try to regain our partner's former affection, it now seems beyond our reach. They don't need more time to figure out their emotions. The phases of Hot and Cold: The "hot" phase begins with a bang of overwhelming recognition. Bathed in newfound attention, flattery and flirtation spark a strong attraction for this person.

The root cause of this behavior is a desperate attempt to gain control over the uncontrollable; love. But the partner, who's committed to playing safe, will never allow himself or herself to experience love.

They'll toy at it, dipping their toes in and out of the water without ever getting wet.

They play on emotional triggers to get you to provide money, gifts or personal details.

Dating and romance scams often take place through online dating websites, but scammers may also use social media or email to make contact.

We even agree to wear “couple outfits” to prove our loyalty and show the public we are taken…Korean Boys like to be Babied It’s not as bad as it sounds. *Pushes Korean Boy out of the way and starts washing dishes.*Korean Boy: Umm… Korean Boy: Well I just got home an hour ago an…*Pushes Korean Boy out of the way and picks up laundry.*Sooni/Lisa: I swear! Let me know when you’re done and I’ll take you out for drinks. Let me call up my girlfriends and let them know we’re hanging out tonight! Drum roll please and more reenactment…Sooni/Lisa: Sweetie, we’re going to hang with my friends tonight and I want you to wear something nice.

We like girlfriends who are concerned about our well-being. If it weren’t for girls like me, you’d still be living with your parents! *Starts vacuuming**Korean Boy starts playing Overwatch/Halo on PC while girlfriend tends to domestic duties.*Korean Boys know when to say Sorry Believe it or not, we hate when our girl is hurt by something we did or said. Don’t you know that cooking for you means that I care about you?? Korean Boys are Obedient Whether you agree or not, Korean boys listen to the advice of their girlfriends. Korean Boy: I’ve hung out with your friends like 20 times so far. Besides, you look so handsome when you wear the right clothes. *Picks the tightest, ball-crushing, skinny jeans that haven’t been worn in years.*Korean Boy: *Gulps.* I really don’t want to wear those.

Behavioral extremes indicate a power play is being employed. Once we have the ability to see hot and cold for what it is, we're less likely to suffer its negative effects.

It's long been the rule that when dating someone whose behavior is marked by hot and cold reactivity, you're standing on shaky ground.

Relationship hiccups occur because your partner is emotionally invested, but scared. Once stated, the hot phase normally reboots and continues with forward movement.

A hot and cold player reverts to cold as the norm, with bursts of hot that don't result in forward movement.

Here’s a good conversational reenactment:*Door bell rings.*Korean Boy: Oh! Stupid or not, we value our relationship and seek to make it stronger. *Puts a fried egg on top/or adds pepper.*Korean Boy: This is like the third day so far that I’ve eaten the same thing. Isn’t it time we just dressed comfortably for once? Can’t I wear the nice khakis/cargo pants I normally wear to school/work?? Don’t you understand that I want you to be the best-looking, handsomest man tonight??

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