With black women dating

Try as I might to suppress the reaction, I experience black men's choice of white women as a personal rejection of the group in which I am a part, of African American women as a whole, who have always been devalued in this society.Certainly my reaction links back to a few bad apples in my own young dating years.

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I wish my male relatives luck and joy in their relationships, but I also feel a pinch when I watch them with their girlfriends.

It is the same sharp tug of disappointment that gets me every time I see a black man with a white woman on his arm.

One of my male relatives brought home a date for Thanksgiving who could have been Barbie's twin sister.

She was blonde, thin, big-bosomed, and even had a Germanic name.

While interracial marriage rates in this country have grown remarkably to 8.4 percent in 2010, Americans still marry within their own racial group the majority of the time.

And when people do venture across the color line to date, they do so in ways that continue to affirm a social hierarchy based on race in which whiteness is prized.Another of my male relatives brought home a woman for Christmas who seemed like a modern-day, socially progressive southern belle.She was blonde, full figured, outgoing, and outspoken with a saucy southern accent and friendly, expressive manner.She was probably very nice; but I cannot say for sure.She was shy and didn't talk much in what was likely an unfamiliar and perhaps overwhelming African American social setting.Despite the steamy scenes on ABC's hit show, (and yes, I am a fan), most single black women are not dating white men (and certainly not hunky white men who hold high government offices and are willing to risk all they have achieved for illicit love).

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